What is attachment? The way I see attachment can be broken down into four main points. It is the relationship between a child and their primary caregiver, (usually a parent) and the extent to which they can rely on that caregiver for comfort and support.
The sharing and amplification of positive emotional states (such as joy and elation), and the sharing and reduction of negative states (such as fear and sadness). These emotional transactions allow a child to ‘feel felt’ (Siegel 1999). It’s a style of interaction, the consistent ways a child relates to the caregiver based on the care and attention they receive. A set of behaviours of ways to signal a need for care such as smiling, crying, clinging, talking and how the caregiver is attuned to sensitively respond to them and lastly it develops a mind-set in the child of how they expect others to behave and what a relationship is.
Attachment theory originated in the 1940s with the ground breaking work of John Bowlby. There are thought to be four types of attachment:
Secure attachment where the main caregiver is sensitive, reliable and emotionally available which leads to a child becoming secure, confident and able to cope with problems. Characterised by the child’s working model of “I need you less because I know I’ve got you” (Kelly 2012).
Ambivalent attachment where a caregiver is sometimes available and responsive and sometimes not, which leads to a child being unsure if that person will be there for them and so clings or fights for more care. The child’s working model here is “I have to hold on tight because I’m not sure of you. I feel anxious but I’m not sure how to get you” (Kelly 2012).
Avoidant attachment where a caregiver is rejecting and emotionally unavailable which leads to a child seeking little contact as they expect rejection and learn to become self-sufficient and angry. Their working model is “I’ve got to manage by myself. If I rely on myself I don’t get so anxious” (Kelly 2012).
Finally, Disorganised attachment, which has a caregiver verbally or physically abusive towards a child, creating a child who is fearful, chaotic and disorientated. Their working model is “I need you desperately and you terrify me. I don’t know what to do but I wont show I’m frightened” (Kelly 2012).
Attachment relationships are vitally important in the unfolding of the emotional and social development of a child during their early years of life. “During these first years brain structures that mediate social and emotional functioning begin to develop in a manner that appears to be dependent on interpersonal experience and the development of close relationships” (Siegel 1999). The quality of the attachment relationship has been linked to the successful development of these aspects of the brain. Development is an on-going process and so close, emotionally involving relationships continue to influence us throughout our lives. “Attachment relationships provide the context for the development of internal working models that shape a child’s perception of themselves, others and the wider world around them” (Atwool 2008). These models help a child to self-regulate their emotions and stress, identify and reflect on internal states of themselves and others, mental representations of themselves and others and strategies for developing and managing relationships throughout their lives.
The key ingredient to developing a secure attachment relationship is sensitive, consistent responsiveness to a child’s needs. Up to around three years a child relies on the caregiver as a safe and secure base to explore from. If a child feels safe and secure with their ‘base’, their exploration will be enhanced. As a child grows and develops past around three years this changes and caregivers need to adjust to accommodate this.
References:
Daniel J. Siegel “Relationships and the Developing Mind” 1999 Child care Information Exchange
Wendy Kelly “Attachment and Emotional Communication” 2012 Workshop
N.R Atwool “Who Cares? The use of attachment assessments in the decision making for children in care” 2008 Unpublished Ph D thesis, Otago University
Interested in learning more about this topic? Check out our course – Attachment and Temperament – via the Online Learning Hub.